GMAT考試作文機(jī)經(jīng) 7月10日更新（三）.

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　　4.

　　原始寂靜：

　　V1(BY: charleschoi): 講The construction of a shopping mall built in Oak City,與此同時(shí)出現(xiàn)了很多問題，如有很多businesses have closed， 還有the number of parking shortage,而且Oak City 附近的Crime等也增多了，因此Elm City should pay attention to Oak City 的現(xiàn)象并且限制 build a shopping mall

　　原題：

　　The following editorial appeared in the Elm City paper.

　　“The construction last year of a shopping mall in downtown Oak City was a mistake. Since the mall has opened, a number of local businesses have closed, and the downtown area suffers from an acute parking shortage, and arrests for crime and vagrancy have increased in the nearby Oak City Park. Elm City should pay attention to the example of the Oak City mall and deny the application to build a shopping mall in Elm City.”

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　　Elm城的報(bào)紙上的社論：

　　去年在橡樹城市中心修建購物中心是個(gè)錯(cuò)誤。由于中心開業(yè)，大量的本地企業(yè)倒閉了。而且市中心受到嚴(yán)重缺乏停車位的困擾。在附近的橡樹城公園拘捕的罪犯和流浪漢也增加了。榆樹城應(yīng)該注意橡樹城購物中心的例子并防止在榆樹城建立購物中心。

　　參考思路：

　　1. 作者所給出的所有問題和商場(chǎng)的建設(shè)都是時(shí)間上的前后關(guān)系而沒有給出證據(jù)顯示他們的因果關(guān)系

　　2. 作者只給出了不好的結(jié)果而沒有給出好的影響很可能權(quán)衡利弊之后被選擇的是要開這個(gè)商場(chǎng)

　　3. 這個(gè)商場(chǎng)的建立不應(yīng)該也不能由此就否定以后所有的商場(chǎng)的建立

　　參考范文：

　　“The construction of last year of a shopping mall in downtown Oak City has done little for the residents of the community. Since the mall has opened, a number of local businesses have closed, and the downtown area suffers from an acute parking shortage. In addition, because the mall’s owner lives in nearby Elm City, the profits derived from sales at the mall are not being returned to the community. These problems, coupled with the increase in trash and litter in nearby Oak City park, demonstrate that Oak City did not use good judgment in allowing the construction of the mall in the first place.”(老題)

　　Discuss how well reasoned... etc.

　　(此文根據(jù)老題寫作)In this editorial the author rebukes Oak City for allowing the construction of a new downtown shopping mall. Citing a number of problems that have occurred since the building of the mail, the author concludes that the residents of Oak City have not benited from the mail and that Oak City exercised poor judgment in allowing the mail to be built. Among the problems cited by the author are the closure of local businesses, lack of parking in the downtown area, and increased trash and litter in a city park near the mall. Moreover, the author argues that profits derived from sales are not beniting Oak City because the owner of the mall lives in another city. The author’s argument is problematic in several respects.

　　In the first place, the author assumes that addition of the new mall is the cause of the various problems cited. The only evidence offered to support this claim is that the construction of the mall occurred bore these problems manifested themselves. However, this evidence is insufficient to establish the claim in question. A chronological relationship is only one of the indicators of a causal relationship between two events.

　　In the second place, the author has focused only on negative fects the mall has had on the city. A more detailed analysis of the situation might reveal that the positive benits for the city far outweigh the problems on which the author focuses. For example, new jobs might have been created for the residents of Oak City, and tax revenues might have been increased for the city. Lacking a more comprehensive analysis of the impact of the mail on Oak City, it is presumptuous on the part of the author to conclude that Oak City’s decision to allow the mall to be built was incorrect.

　　In conclusion, the author’s argument is unconvincing. To strengthen the argument the author would have to demonstrate that the construction of the mall caused the various problems mentioned. The author would also have to show that the negative fects of the project outweighed the positive fects.

　相關(guān)鏈接：

1.790分考生談GMAT考試突破心得：GMAT作文

2.GMAT考試作文機(jī)經(jīng) 7月10日更新（二）

3.GMAT作文經(jīng)典案例集錦